Finding a Balance

After spending 2 weeks with family I have come to appreciate them even more.  My parents set such a good example of making family a priority.  Maybe it was growing up 15 miles from my dad’s parents.  They firmly believed that family came first and showed it in their words and actions.  My father was not an entrepreneur, but he worked hard to provide for our needs.  They supported us in our various activities while also teaching us responsibility and love for each other and the gospel.

The only thing missing from my visit to Utah was my parents.  They are currently serving a mission.  They are sacrificing these family moments to serve the Lord – another valuable lesson they taught.  But they were missed.  Right now we are only separated by miles, and I look forward to the time when we can all be together again.

In visiting with my brother, who recently started a new job, I learned a few things about priorities.  No matter how much you are being paid, no matter what perks the company offers, there is no happiness without balance.  He left a job that was too demanding of his every minute of every day, 7 days a week.  There are certain boundaries that need to be set.  What these boundaries are will be different for everybody.  The cost was too great for my brother, so he made the necessary changes.  He and his family are much happier and he is looking at this as an opportunity to expand his knowledge and increase his networking base and his experiences.

Part of our trip included a reunion of my mother-in-law’s siblings.  There were many moments of reflection and seeing the 150 + (counting just those that were present) that came just from grandma and grandpa was amazing.  They knew that family came first.  Throughout their jobs, they found how to include their kids and create many fond memories together. 

In the end, it won’t matter how much money I made if my kids don’t know who I am or if we don’t have memories and relationships to bind us.  So while I want to use my talents and skills to make a difference in the lives of others, I do not want to do it at the cost of losing my own family.  There must be a balance.  It is important to teach our children the value of hard work and setting goals, but families are important and those are the things we will be able to take with us when we leave this earth.  

Happiness

Am I happy?  I believe that I am.  But I also look forward to the day when I could be happier.  When that day will come and what will make it be better than today I do not know.  Perhaps I am looking too far.

According the “Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness: A Cautionary Tale” published by the Acton Foundation suggests, “You likely are as happy today as you ever will be.” (pg 2)  I do have many blessings and things to be thankful for.  I live in a free country.  My family has sufficient supplies/things to meet our needs.  My kids are healthy and happy.  We have a beautiful home to protect us.  What do I think I need to be happier? 

My dad gave a devotional address at BYU-H last fall about happiness.  He suggested 3 things to become happy.  The first is to open your eyes.  We are surrounded by many wonderful things.  My kids have the opportunity to attend school and get a quality education.  My husband has a job that allows him many freedoms and supports our family.  I have always been blessed with the opportunity to stay home with my kids.  Looking for the good things, and realizing how blessed we really are can cause us to be happy.  The second thing is to surround ourselves with happy people.  I have found this to have a profound effect on me lately.  I have been around a few people that are draining and negative, and difficult to be with.  I realized how much their attitudes and complaints were effecting me.  I have learned to continue to be a positive person around them, but to not spend too much time around that negativity.  I have also found strength surrounding myself with family members and friends who are positive.  My parents are always positive and encouraging in the counsel they give.  The prophet and the apostles are always happy and positive in their counsel as well.  The last thing my dad suggested was to show gratitude.  Showing gratitude to others, especially our family members, can create a feeling of happiness that can swell to all members of the family.  Showing gratitude to my Father in Heaven is also important.  When we show gratitude, we are acknowledging the happiness we feel.  And we then have the desire to share that happiness with others.

To be successful, I believe I need to be happy and keep a positive attitude.  Whether it is successfully finishing this class or successfully finishing my degree, successfully raising righteous children that qualify for the blessings of the temple, or successfully serving each and every day.  I will gain so much more if I do each of these things with a happy attitude.